The Fourth of July is awesome. Grilling hot dogs, seeing Will Smith movies, and lighting fireworks is something that America should do more often! And while we thought about boring you with a PSA about firework safety, the Slobs have instead decided to remind you about Boom Boom Rocket and FantaVision: two firework-crazy games that don't even require you to step away from your BBQ ribs!
For the best firework gaming experience you can get, just have a few things handy:
- A big-ass television
- FantaVision and a PS2, or Boom Boom Rocket and an X360
- Huge speakers
- A DDR pad for multiplayer parties
And presto! Instant, non-injury risk fireworks for everyone! We'll see you guys back here next week, so don't lose any fingers!
Ask any gamer why it is they play games for hours on end and they'll likely mention the fact that games, whether we're talking Metal Gear or Mario Bros., empower us gamers with the ability to do things and to play roles that we can't in real life. Imagine for a moment what you could accomplish if you were able to take those incredible game characters' powers out of the game itself and use them in real life. We've selected 9 video game super powers that we'd love to use in order to rule at real life.
Never Leave the Couch via Dhalsim's Yoga Stretch - Getting up to grab food and remote controls won't ever be a problem with a little yoga training.
We've got a brand-new copy of My Weight Loss Coach burning a hole in our cubicle, so we're having a good old-fashioned picture contest! Rules: Send us a photo of your gamer gut, and the best one wins My Weight Loss Coach! We repeat, the photo must include your gamer-gut with any gaming controller, and NO photoshopping!
(Send your entries to mckinley_noble@gamepro.com and keep it PG!)
HINT: Be creative! Use a Rock Band controller or that Taiko Drum Master set rotting away in your closet! Hell, we might just give the prize away to someone with a Power Glove, who knows?
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew.
WINNARS: Our winners, edgefusion and chazone get the technical tie! Send your info to me via PM or email to claim your free stuff. Next time, we'll have a harder screenshot!
This game's old, but an obscure cult classic. Will the first commenter win?
Welcome, true slobs! We're winding down a frantic Friday here at SlobsofGaming, so let's all kick back with a little obscure screenshot trivia -- guess the game, win a prize, all that jazz. We'll update right here once we have a winnar!
Once in an era, there is a forum thread so epic, so brilliant, that all other topics pale in comparison to its god-like splendor. The GamePro users, dubbed by us as the Forum Phenoms, have created a thread that makes every morning a joy to be alive. Started by GamePro user fatface, the "Motivational GamePro Pictues" (yes, it's mispelled) thread has amassed a fantastic following, a wonderful wave of user-built ingenuity.
UPDATE: New pictures are up! Now with 100% less nipples!
Forums Ho!
fatface: "So I've been having some fun today making some "motivational" pictures, such as one's like these for my website. I thought it might be funny if we all made some funny pictures ourselves, whether about a forum member, this site, other sites or whatever you find hilarious in general. You can make your own motivators right here, without using Photoshop to do it properly lol. I give my thanks to gateguy for sharing the url :o"
While the gaming industry seems to have attracted a new fan base with peripherals and games that cater to fitness, it seems that the older, hardcore gamers are being forgotten and getting left out. With that in mind, we have compiled a list of future video game peripherals that would accommodate this passionate player and cater to what they truly want: to be lazier.
7: The Gaming Suit
How many times while enjoying an extended match of shoot-em-up has some whiner walked by, called you a slob and then complained of a strange odor radiating from you. And while we understand that you have a glandular problem and that it isn't necessarily your fault, they seem determined to blame your poor hygiene as the culprit. If this has ever happened to you, let me introduce The Gaming Suit. This skin tight, space-age polymer ensemble not only looks great but also contains tiny internal aqua jets that when hooked up to a water source will administer small spurts of H2O that thoroughly clean your body while also preventing annoying bed sores. Additionally, the airtight polymers not only trap and contain any noxious bodily odors but the suit's slick exterior sheen is reminiscent of dinnerware. This means you'll have a place to set all your favorite snacks and edibles without worrying about staining or ruining the suit's stylish aesthetic. And exterior clean up is a breeze: simply remove the water supply and hose yourself off. Presto! Good as new. Comes in 4 great sizes, including L, XL, XXL, and XXXL.
It's a fantasy that only the most hardcore science fiction nerds hold on to: the invention of the robot girlfriend. In case you haven't heard, Sega is hitting the market with "EMA", the robot girlfriend that swings her/it's butt as she/it walks and uses infra-red sensors to target your face with kisses. It invades Japan this Fall, but will it take over the rest of the world?
The SlobsofGaming are taking some time to warn you: it starts with innocent toys like EMA, but before you know it, all the women in the world could be replaced by these docile, subservient robots. THIS IS A BAD THING. Just don't say we didn't warn you. Here's 3 reasons why nerds and Trekkie-fetishists should suck it up and stick with real women. This is important.
3. Real girls don't run on batteries.
This problem alone guarantees that a real girlfriend will always be able to outdo a robot. Just like a DS or a PSP, a machine will only function while it has battery power. Can you imagine dating a robot, and it dies right before the goodnight kiss? Real girls, however, will often run circles around you until the late hours of the evening. All that takes is soda and snacks.
No wishful thinking here! In video games, it's rare to see an actual swimsuit on any female video game character that isn't fan art. The Slobs are saluting the swimsuit and its appearance in video games from Metroid to DOA Xtreme Beach Volleyball!
Let's get HOT.
7. Vice City's Latina Seductress
Ah, the GTA Latina. She drew us into the game right from the box art, and we all stayed for the actual game itself. It didn't hurt that GTA Vice City was one of the best titles on the block, either.
Video games are more valuable to the comic book industry than quarters are to an arcade junkie. In a way, the popularity of certain comic superheroes partially depends on the success of their respective games. After all, having a kickass movie doesn't mean that the tie-in video game is going to deliver.
But even though Marvel's literally shitting money thanks to Spider-Man, Iron Man, and the new Hulk movie, the games spawned from all these franchises are largely hit-and-miss. Thankfully, the Slobs are here to help. Straight from people who can recite the entire DC and Marvel sagas in a nutshell, here's a quick list of VERY IMPORTANT rules for making future superhero-comic-video games, taken from screw-ups going as far back as the 80s:
Make the superhero super-powerful. Street thugs and minions shouldn't be harder to kill the main villains and bosses.
In any superhero movie, thugs and gang members are beaten easily, soundly, and with dramatic flair. In video games, getting surrounded by dangerous titans like "Lizzie," "David," and the dreaded "Foot Soldier" can mean a quick death. What's wrong with that picture?
Sadly, Spider-Man was no match for the terrifying Lizzie and her hair-whip of Inescapable Death.
Sure, Sony's going to be riding high on the Metal Gear Solid 4 sales, but there's plenty of other games that could easily sell PS3 units. When IS Final Fantasy VII coming out again, anyway? Is it too soon for another Grand Theft Auto? And where in the Hell is my Mega Man Legends sequel? Sony... you have some explaining to do!
The SlobsofGaming have plumbed the depths of their PSX jewel cases and selected 20 games that need to be revived on the PlayStation 3...
Note: The box art for our #1 PS3 title is totally legit. We're 103 percent serious that it's the real thing. Ahh, we're just kidding. Or are we? Yes... Maybe.
#20: Def Jam: Parappa the Rapper
Everyone who played the original Parappa game is almost 10 years older, so it's time to put some blat-blat in this shitznit. This game would adapt new and classic hip-hop joints like Jay-Z's "99 Problems," the Ludacris hit "Move Bitch," and 50 Cent's "Candy Shop". Of course, this game would be rated M -- not just for the thug life and uncensored lyrics, but also for the strip-club bonus stages and badonkadonk booty girls.More features we'd like to see would include unlockable bling, console-exclusive tracks, and cameos from none other than G-Unit.
Awwwwwwwww yeah.
LongHairedOffender (39)
- Celebrate the 4th With Video Game Fireworks!
- If you're prone to getting burnt by fireworks, the SlobsofGaming have two awesome alternatives in today's 4th of July post!
- http://www.slobsofgaming.com/article/91613/celebrate-the-4th-with-video-game-fireworks/
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